Thursday, February 17, 2011

Dare Ten: Love is a choice

Sometimes showing love to your spouse does not look very romantic to the rest of the world.  In fact, the one intentional thing that I did to fulfill yesterday's dare would be absolutely dumb to anyone else.  The dare said to "do something out of the ordinary today for your spouse - something that proves (to you and to them) that your love is based on your choice and nothing else."  Well, yesterday, I bought James Organic Chicken Better Than Bouillon!

I knew that James had wanted some more Chicken Better Than Bouillon, and I also knew that he would love that I found it in organic.  Fulfilling the dare meant going out of my way, putting off a few other things that I needed to be doing, and visiting the Coast Health & Nutrition off of 49.  I had to choose to show my love in that way.

James loved it.  He found it in the bag on the sofa before I got home from Growth Group last night.  I pulled it out of the bag to show him later on, and he said that he had seen it.  Not only did I get a smile out of the deal, but I could see that he knew that I had done something special for him.  While I thought this was the completion of the dare, I had no idea that this dare was going to be tested again this morning.

James lets his alarm go off time after time in the morning.  The second time it went off, I woke up.  Unlike my typical bad attitude upon awaking to a blaring alarm, I simply asked him if he would please get up so it would not go off again.  He did not want to get up, and wanted to keep sleeping until the alarm went off again.  I was hurt.  I shared my feelings and told him how I knew he wanted sleep, but that my sleep was being disrupted by the alarm.  Again, he was not moved to action.  Finally, the alarm went off once more.

He decided to try to prove his point about not wanting to get up when I asked him by asking me if I would like to get up to fix him breakfast.  It was not really the dare, it was not really me trying to prove a point (though maybe a little), but I really wanted to show him that my love was unconditional.  I got up out of bed upon his request and fixed him breakfast.  He thought I was just trying to pull a "holier than thou", but I explained that I love him that much.  I wanted to do what he asked.  My reaction was my choice, and though he did not have the best attitude this morning, my love is my choice.  When I choose to love, it is not dependant on his perfect attitude.

I honestly did not expect to be fulfilling this dare with anything but the Organic Chicken Better Than Bouillon.  God's grace was more than sufficient, and He gave me the strength to show my love this morning.  I really surprised myself by not getting mad.  I think I surprised James too.  The more I open up my heart to true unconditional love, the more I realize that I am opening up my marriage to God's power.  Not only is The Love Dare teaching me how to love my husband, it is teaching me to open up my life to God's love.

2 comments:

  1. I love it!!! Bert and I have been following the dares before and adding them to the day. And we find that we are loving the book even more with the dares building to one another. Pretty soon, you will get the question, what dare are you on. That's why I chose to let Bert know I was doing the dare. He would think something was up my sleeve. Just this afternoon, I went to the store to get a tv dinner since he was getting ready for work. I came back with not only something for just myself to eat, but something he likes too. I told him that I had something I knew that said I was thinking of him. Boiled Peanuts. He said thank you honey. I got a longer than expected kiss before he went to work. If I have to buy boiled peanuts more often/unexpectedly to get a kiss like that, then I will!! lol.

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  2. James isn't catching on so far. I mean maybe he is guessing that I'm reading some book on marriage, but I don't think it has crossed his mind about The Love Dare book. I was thinking about telling him on dare 20.

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