To James: I love you regardless. No matter what you do or say, you are getting love from me. The love that I offered on our wedding day was not a whishy washy dependent on you type of love, I offered you a love that was unconditional. These are the vows that I said on our wedding day:
I do take you James to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, to give and to receive, to speak and to listen, to be loyal to you, till death us do part according to God’s Holy Law.
James, to you, I offer my life, my body, my strength, my support, and my loyalty. I offer my faith, my hope, and my love in all the changing circumstances of life as long as we both shall live.
The twenty second dare expressed that “love is a choice, not a feeling. It is an initiated action, not a knee-jerk reaction. Choose today to be committed to love even if your spouse has lost most of their interest in receiving it. Say to them today in words similar to these, ‘I love you. Period. I choose to love you even if you don’t love me in return.’” I am blessed. James does reciprocate my love, but not always the way that I wish he would. Sometimes it feels like he’s expressing his love in Zulu while I feel that I’m expressing my love in Cupidese.
In response to God’s unconditional love, I can give James love no matter whether he loves me “adequately” or not. James’s love is not sufficient, God’s is. My love is not sufficient for James either, only God has the love that is unlike any other. Sometimes I find myself looking to James for fulfillment in love, but only God can provide that to me. As I learn to depend on God’s love to fulfill my heart, I want to love James unconditionally with all my heart.
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